#Me Too, Sis

In this post, I explain how the attempted white-washing and decontextualizing of the #MeToo catchphrase threatened to leave many rape survivors vulnerable and left out of the conversation. 
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​The #MeToo campaign was the brainchild of Black woman activist, Taraka Burke, in 2007. The campaign has recently regained momentum on social media.

In describing the #MeToo campaign, Burke articulates for Ebony magazine:

​“It was a catchphrase to be used from survivor to survivor to let folks know that they were not alone and that a movement for radical healing was happening and possible.” (Source: https://goo.gl/2466ho).

The activist wanted to give voice and a face to rape survivors and their silenced experiences with violence.

Voyeurism and Rape

An often overlooked aspect of rape culture is voyeurism. Even though feelings of internalized shame is a major reason why many girls and women remain silent about being raped, the voyeuristic aspect of rape culture also plays a major role in why many women rape survivors do not readily come forward. Voyeurism is a HUGE aspect of rape culture. Voyeurism plays out in different ways in American rape culture.

Some perpetrators celebrate their conquests in multiple ways that are actually rewarded. Sometimes these celebrations are overt, whereas, other times they are more subtle. For example, rapists at times brag to male friends, fellow athletes and fraternity brothers. Rapists have even been known to video-record assaults for their own pleasure or others (Allegedly R. Kelly. Blink, blink)!

And, many girls and women survivors report being victims of voyeurism and stalked by their rapists before or after a rape.

Mass shootings are acts of terrorism because they cause pain, fear, and confusion to immediate direct victims and onlookers near and far. Mass shootings equate to mass trauma. Because mass shootings in the U.S. are predominately a White male phenomenon, with victims representing every racial, ethnic, social class, and gender group, it can be stated unequivocally that all social groups are victims of White male heteropatriarchy violence.

​Our nation was founded on White male violence: the attempted genocide and colonization of indigenous people and other natural resources, enslavement of Africans and the pillaging of their land, and domestic and sexual domination of women. To be blunt, rape and lynching like mass shootings are American as American pie (and I ain’t talkin’ about your grandmother's peach cobbler here).

​White men are the face of American terrorism, even when media and politicians scapegoat Black and Brown people to justify U.S. terrorism, domestically and overseas.
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Daily, immigrants, Black, and Brown Americans are treated on our streets, in classrooms and airports as potential terrorists or threats to America's peace and tranquility.

However, for women and non-White Americans of all genders, White men represent present-day symbolic and material threats to our mental and physical well-being. Unfortunately, for every mass shooting aired on news channels and social media feeds, people of color and women of various hues are psychologically wounded and re-traumatized. 

Phallic-narcissism coupled with White supremacy (as political, economic, and racial ideology) are deeply engrained in U.S. culture, and consequently, trauma is deeply engrained in American citizens' psyches.

For example,  our welfare policies are archaic and unforgiving of poor women and children, necropolitics in urban epicenters serve to criminalize the poor and youth of color, and our schools attempt to culturally assimilate and/or psychologically assassinate young people of color with the implicit (and often explicit) objective of preventing suspected future violence.

Undoubtedly, after this post, I will be told that I make everything about race. Or, that I am anti-American. And my all-time favorite, that I am racist against White people.

My response: when will Americans begin to question the motives, psyches, and behaviors of its White men (collectively speaking, of course); and stop attacking the victims of White male terrorism, and stop interrogating the individuals who seek to understand the historical pattern of White male violence?

​Our critical questioning and pushback (or Black girl clap backs) serve to prevent structural/intimate/interpersonal violence driven by White male heteropatriarchal terrorism. Our nation’s politicians, social workers, police officers, educators, and everyday taxpayers spend (or should I say earn) millions trying to solve the Black male, welfare queen, and immigrant "problem" (i.e. the prison industrial complex, non-profit industrial complex, and "border control").

Oddly, enough all of these imagined "social problems" are related back to a White male masculinity problem, which is evidenced as a history of economic exploitation, political and education disenfranchisement, state sanctioned violence, colonization, and pervasive and persistent acts of terror.

The problem with unchecked, uncompassionate capitalism and White supremacy is that White male pathology actually yields economic profits for the elite. Gun sells, gated communities, security systems, and private prisons equal millions in profits for White males. Conversely, trauma causes loss wages and debt for White supremacy's traumatized victims.

White male terrorism (or fears of castration and impotence) is a profit industry. 

To conclude, mental health advocacy must actively seek the eradication of White male patriarchy supremacy. Historically, attention was given to understanding European male psychology. Unfortunately, most of that  pseudo/science has been used to dominate, mutilate, and annihilate those that appear as a threat to the White male psyche.

But, it's time to flip the script. We can combat White male heteropatriarchy terrorism and the mass trauma it causes. 

However, if we truly believe in humanity and human rights, we do not need to “lock up” all White men, or screen them extra hard at the airports, or shoot them down in the streets like dogs, or build border walls to keep them completely out of the country, or put in place education programs that strip them of their masculinity, cultural identity, or of human dignity.

But, we can teach boys and men empathy for the human race (and land, animal, and plant life), and put in place policies that prevent and mediate unchecked masculinity, such as gun control laws, roll back on funding of the military industrial complex, and hold serious legislation discussions on pornography laws (that discussion is for another post). 

Lastly, we can teach and model in schools, churches, and family homes, that violence and aggression are not equal to manhood (or Whiteness), and that love and compassion are universal human traits across sexes and genders. All of these suggestions are beginnings, not the end all.

At the same time, we have to keep in mind that it took centuries to get to a place in America where violence is commonplace, thus, it will take many more decades to clean up the traumatic messes of White male heteropatriarchy violence.

What do you believe is a practical response to White male terrorism? 

In solidarity,
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Dr. Venus Evans-Winters
"Not your mother's therapist, or your brother's life coach"

Dear Sister,

I write this letter to you as a daughter, sister, mother, and friend whom has been wounded in the past by personal acquaintances, strangers, and enemies alike. Reading about the horrific death and possibly alleged* assault of Kenneka Jenkins was like handing my psyche over to a public firing squad.

Sister, over the next few days or weeks people are going to blame another young sister for Kenneka's death and alleged assault; others will attempt to blame her Black mother for not supervising her whereabouts; and people will blame Kenneka herself for being at a hotel and being overly trusting of her friends. 

People will even blame the police and media for not covering the story and seeking out answers. In turn, the media will turn the lens back on Kenneka herself, her mother, friends, or Black people in general. Inevitably, somehow Black women will become simultaneously the overlooked victims and targets of this tragedy.

Compassion and empathy will be lost to blame. Sister, how do we begin to move the conversation from self-blame to healing?

For me, I was overwhelmed by the nonchalant attitude of possible witnesses of violence* occurring in various renditions of circulating videos, but I was more disheartened by the amount of young women who openly admitted that they needed to stop watching or could not watch any longer the videos and tweets titled, #KennekaJenkins, because it brought back too many memories of their own rape or experience with physical violence and betrayal. 

Last night, I went to sleep feeling emotionally exhausted and saddened. I even had a nightmare that involved guns and the threat of rape. The hypothesis of Kenneka's final moments before her death coupled with the realization that dozens of Black women were admitting online in social media that they were once violated and survivors of rape caused me to be emotionally depleted.

Women spoke of the words and images describing the brutal assault as a trigger.

These public disclosures made me wonder: 

1)Exactly how many young Black women are survivors of rape and never report the rape?
2) How many young Black women are required to cope in silence with their memories of a rape and/or assault with no one to talk to?
3) How many Black girls and women have to live out over and over again their assault via music, television, or social media?
4) Worse yet, how many mothers are burdened with the helpless feeling that no matter how much she loves her daughter, tries to protect her daughter, and teaches her daughter to stand up and fight for herself that she still will not be able to protect her daughter from being physically harmed, maimed, or death?  

At some point, we even have to consider the pain of the so-called friend depicted* in the video. How much pain must a young woman must have experienced in her lifetime that she could sit back, record, and numb herself to another nearby sister in pain or in harm's way? It is easy to point fingers and to place blame, but I also wonder how have we failed this young sister.

Sister, we will do more to heal you and to protect your future daughters from rape, sexual assault, and other forms of physical abuse.  

• WE can begin this healing process by admitting to you our own past history with trauma (and our strategies with coping).
• We will also teach our boys and men about the effects of violence on Black women's bodies, spirits, psyches, and relationships.
• We can use education to prevent boys and girls from doing harm to a Black young woman.
• We must also work to bring about economic and mental health policies that unabashedly places Black girls and women first. 

In closing, sister, we promise to continue to lift with you as you carry forward our burden, proudly stand with you in your strength, and without shame we walk with you in your healing journey.

Peace,

Dr. Venus Evans-Winters (a.k.a. DrV)

Further Readings:

Sexual Assault Awareness Month: Why We Must Focus on Black Girls: http://www.theroot.com/sexual-assault-awareness-month-why-we-must-focus-on-bl-1794400667

Women of Color and Sexual Assault: https://endsexualviolencect.org/resources/get-the-facts/women-of-color-and-sexual-assault/
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​*Indicates language change related to updates of the Kenneka Jenkins case: http://trib.in/2xo4DMz